I don't usually arrange sex via text message
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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