hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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