ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Where did you get a picture of my penis
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Sorry about my life...
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
