I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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