can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Randomize