the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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