YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Randomize