thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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