I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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