I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
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