Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Come on in and take your pants off
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