I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Randomize
