What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
My penis needs a shock collar
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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