Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
What happened to fro yo and sex?
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Randomize
