my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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