White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
