If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
