Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Randomize
