kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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