i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Randomize
