Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
