We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
