you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
he laminated a picture of his dick.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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