Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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