i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
