The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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