After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
