I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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