I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
They took my balls.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Randomize
