Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
