So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
