Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize