The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Im part way to drunk.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
