i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
We're not piercing ourselves today.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
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