Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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