I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
