Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
