Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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