if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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