We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I still have a little drunk in my system
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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