At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Randomize
