Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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