What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
