let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
