he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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