My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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