Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
