I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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