you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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