He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize
